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How would you rate this poem?
Posted: Apr 15, 2005 7:30pm
by Angel of Music
On a scale of 1-10, rate this poem honestly.
Title:Rejection and Desperation
He calls five times a day
Trying to get me to answer
Or hoping to find a way
To get me to let my wall down
So I can pity his false tears
Calling, calling, never ceasing,
I will never forgive him,
I'll just ignore him,
Doesn't he know the despair
He has caused to my heart?
Calling, calling as if someone was there,
But I won't answer
Cause I don't care
Just like he didn't care
???What do you think???

re: How would you rate this poem?
Posted: Apr 15, 2005 8:18pm
by MoonlightRose Kurama
10.It is good!I love it.
re: How would you rate this poem?
Posted: Apr 15, 2005 8:23pm
by Angel of Music
Thank you.

re: How would you rate this poem?
Posted: Apr 16, 2005 12:34am
by Hamlet
Very nice!
& Whether you intended it to be such a way or not, that poem can easily fall under women empowerment.

However, if he really calls so much, 'twould probably be best to just block his number...
re: How would you rate this poem?
Posted: Apr 16, 2005 7:00am
by josh
I give it a 10 as it seems original and well-written. But it's missing a question mark (?).
wub!
re: How would you rate this poem?
Posted: Apr 16, 2005 9:00am
by Smileycute_Kagome
i'll give u 10 coz i luv it!!!!
re: How would you rate this poem?
Posted: Apr 16, 2005 7:27pm
by MoonlightRose Kurama
More!
re: How would you rate this poem?
Posted: Apr 17, 2005 2:57pm
by Angel of Music
Ok. How about this one:
Title:Chained Desires
I wish I could
Discard my chain,
Uncage my heart
And dust it off.
Someone release me
From my bottle
My nightmare, my pain
Is forever, eternal.
Until the love
I have searched for,
With much hinderance
I shalt wallow
In my sorrow
Until my savoir
Does rescue me.
It's an old one, but I edited it.

Re: re: How would you rate this poem?
Posted: Apr 17, 2005 8:51pm
by MoonlightRose Kurama
shinzoluverneo1 wrote:Ok. How about this one:
Title:Chained Desires
I wish I could
Discard my chain,
Uncage my heart
And dust it off.
Someone release me
From my bottle
My nightmare, my pain
Is forever, eternal.
Until the love
I have searched for,
With much hinderance
I shalt wallow
In my sorrow
Until my savoir
Does rescue me.
It's an old one, but I edited it.

I love it!
re: How would you rate this poem?
Posted: Apr 17, 2005 10:48pm
by Angel of Music
Thank you. Im not that good, but Im working on my skills.

re: How would you rate this poem?
Posted: Apr 17, 2005 11:21pm
by Baka-Tenshi
They're both great poems Shinzoluver! I liked both of them very much, the ryming was very good, and the flow of it was very nice as well. I give it a 10. ^_^
re: How would you rate this poem?
Posted: Apr 17, 2005 11:22pm
by High Priest Seto
omg the 1st one sounds as if the guy was me =S i feel sad now i wanna cry

re: How would you rate this poem?
Posted: Apr 17, 2005 11:32pm
by Angel of Music
Don't be sad. I was relating to my own guy problems. I wasn't trying to pin anybody for the same thing. I was just siphoning my anger into poetry. Imgood at that, just not at writing how I feel without alot of foul language, and I shouldn't be putting colorful metaphors like that into poetry.
re: How would you rate this poem?
Posted: Apr 17, 2005 11:47pm
by High Priest Seto
hehehe i'm all happy now

Re: re: How would you rate this poem?
Posted: Apr 18, 2005 12:16am
by Hamlet
shinzoluverneo1 wrote:Ok. How about this one:
Title:Chained Desires
I wish I could
Discard my chain,
Uncage my heart
And dust it off.
Someone release me
From my bottle
My nightmare, my pain
Is forever, eternal.
Until the love
I have searched for,
With much hinderance
I shalt wallow
In my sorrow
Until my savoir
Does rescue me.
It's an old one, but I edited it.

In response to this....
If you wait for him, Love will come to you,
But if you’re enshelled he shan’t be able to reach...
He couldn’t help, for there’s nothing he can do,
To even be heard he would need to screech...
So, in place of thinking on of your wish for Love,
Take your head out of the clouds up above,
And actually think about what you need to do,
For the only one who can save you is you...
re: How would you rate this poem?
Posted: Apr 18, 2005 12:24am
by ~Yamiko~
I give both Hamlet and shinzo a 10!!!