Pregnancy Scares

[Kitty]

If you ever do get pregnant, don't automatically decide whether its a keep or abort situation. Your circumstances nine months down the track could be so much better than what you're basing your decision on. Giving it up for adoption is the best decision if you know that you can't care for the baby, because who knows what that little person could grow up to be, right?

And some guys are just F@king idiots, I know a friend who was pressured into having sex and found out she's pregnant, and she told me that the first thing the guy said to her was "we can still have sex because it doesn't matter now since you're pregnant" . So ladies, make sure you know the guy you're seeing and that they have the same values as you do and that they respect yours, don't give in to what they want if you don't want it.

Some people, like me, wouldn't be able to put it up for adoption. I for one couldn't do that especially if I'm still living with my parents because I know my parents would be disappointed in me and I wouldn't want that and I'm sure my dad would probably kick me out but that is if I am still living here. I wouldn't be able to keep the baby if I still lived with them so my only option would be abortion. And it's not like in nine months I'm gonna get a job and be able to move out. It takes time to save the money to move out.

I know my man wouldn't be like that if I got pregnant, he would probably flip out. but I know he wouldn't leave me either. But i'm not worried about getting pregnant, I have condoms and the shot.

[Jade_Steel_Hawk]

Your parents wouldn't be disappointed in you if you got an abortion?

[SASSZAIN]

Kitty, do you realize how much time 9 months is? Its a looong time. Time enough to save up a few thousand easily enough, if you're working at least 5-6 hours a day, and budget for savings and not for spending.

all guys are F*(&^ing idiots. just to a different degree for each.

Don't go around the Censor rule Sassz.

You to Revy

Read the original version of this post.

[Kitty]

I think my parents would be more disappointed in me being pregnant and I would get an abortion so they wouldn't know.

9 months is a long time but what if I don't get a job till say about 5 months into the pregnancy. That and who would hire a pregnant woman? You also have to account for furniture when you get say an apartment, gas to drive to work and things needed like medicine or shampoo and stuff like that. But I guess I would probably have enough if I had a job. But a lot of the apartments around here are like $800 or higher a month. -.-

Now I do wish I had a job so I could move out soon lol. I need to get my arse moving so I can go to school and then get a job and move out.

[Revy the two hands]

Yeah but you would know that you had an abortion and would have to live with the fact that you erased a potential human being. You shouldn't care what people are gonna say about it, because it's not their business or place to judge, even if you know your parents are gonna go crazy, they would eventually come around (if they were good parents). My friend is doing a great job and everyone loves the little guy, even after all the low points.

Jobs are easy to get if you look hard enough and aren't picky about it.

[Tailtiu]

I would honestly consider an abortion, if it came down to that. Spare me the "9 mo. is a long time" speech, and "There's always adoption"- I'd look into adoption, but why bring another life into this world if it's creators can't take care of it? There's enough kids all ready that need homes and determined to find a job or not, I refuse to put the burden of a baby on my parents while I finish school. I know that it's all a matter of religious or personal beliefs, but abortion is a viable option.

[Pennyroyal Tea]

Some of these arguments are pretty ridiculous. Now I'm not even going to quote the guy or mention him by name, because that's how little I respect his opinion. But I will focus my attention on some of the points he made, even if it's indirect.


Most people make it seem like the girl doesn't always have a plan when it comes to getting pregnant. It's happened enough where I think that most people have some sort of planned if this were to happen if they were sexually active. So even if they decided to get an abortion they likely would have decided that a very long time beforehand if it were to happen. True most people think they're immune to getting hurt, but that's just an effect of being a child.

Now here's another thing. Either way, it's a personal decision, and you can throw religion and everything else in it, but the truth is, we're supposed to save the judgments for God. Lets not forget it was Jesus himself who said. let he who is without sin cast the first stone I think that as Christians, it's our job to guide people to the right decision, but we stop short of judging them for it even if we disagree.

And I feel that on all sides, there is that sort of judgmental connotation attached to it, you don't know how people will feel, and if they feel bad, it's their struggle, as it is their decision.

[Kitty]

I stopped believing there was a god or jesus when my brother died. I've tried believing again but it just fails horribly.

I for one am not immune to getting hurt. It would hurt me to abort a human being growing inside me but its pretty much my only option. And I do care what my parents think of me. Their the only ones that I care what they think of me.
And yes I have had this planned for a long time. If I were to get pregnant it would most likely be abortion for me unless I am actually moved out and living in my own place then I would keep the baby. Everyone has their own decisions on pregnancy and this is mine.

[Revy the two hands]

It is a personal decision, but let's not forget that it's not the baby's fault for being conceived. In most cases it is a selfish decision because the first thing females think about is what people are going to think, they never planned it and how they're life is going to be like. In my oppinion I don't see how abortion is better than adoption. A couple of my close friends had abortions but I never see them any different, they just made an irrational decision at a stressful time and they agree and do regret it.

[Kitty]

In my opinion the woman has the right to have an abortion. I only care what my parents think because they are my parents. They would be disappointed if I were to get pregnant and I wouldn't want that. I would get an abortion so they wouldn't know and couldn't be disappointed in me. Not only that but I would probably get kicked out. It maybe a selfish decision but its the womans choice and right to do what they want with the child. And not all women make irrational decisions on it at a stressful time. I've had this planned for a long time. So its not a stressful choice or time for me, I already know just in case what I am going to do. It would hurt me and I would probably regret doing it but it's my choice.

Adoption is worse because your giving up your child to a stranger and you probably will never see that child again. If I were to give up my child to a complete stranger I would eventually want the child back, but I can't do that. So I would rather keep the baby.

But like I said before, if I am out on my own in my own like apartment I would keep the baby probably, but if i'm still living with my parents I would have an abortion.

[Pennyroyal Tea]

It is a personal decision, but let's not forget that it's not the baby's fault for being conceived. In most cases it is a selfish decision because the first thing females think about is what people are going to think, they never planned it and how they're life is going to be like. In my oppinion I don't see how abortion is better than adoption. A couple of my close friends had abortions but I never see them any different, they just made an irrational decision at a stressful time and they agree and do regret it.

You know this how? I was "adopted" and I can definitely tell you, it's not good. And you're being incredibly judgmental

[Revy the two hands]

It is a personal decision, but let's not forget that it's not the baby's fault for being conceived. In most cases it is a selfish decision because the first thing females think about is what people are going to think, they never planned it and how they're life is going to be like. In my oppinion I don't see how abortion is better than adoption. A couple of my close friends had abortions but I never see them any different, they just made an irrational decision at a stressful time and they agree and do regret it.

You know this how? I was "adopted" and I can definitely tell you, it's not good. And you're being incredibly judgmental

You don't need to know my life story. But of course the family you are to be adopted in would have to be one that is loving, perhaps you had a bad experience. What's worse than giving a helpless child to someone who doesn't care about them. But then that's the fault of social services.

[Pennyroyal Tea]

It is a personal decision, but let's not forget that it's not the baby's fault for being conceived. In most cases it is a selfish decision because the first thing females think about is what people are going to think, they never planned it and how they're life is going to be like. In my oppinion I don't see how abortion is better than adoption. A couple of my close friends had abortions but I never see them any different, they just made an irrational decision at a stressful time and they agree and do regret it.

You know this how? I was "adopted" and I can definitely tell you, it's not good. And you're being incredibly judgmental

You don't need to know my life story. But of course the family you are to be adopted in would have to be one that is loving, perhaps you had a bad experience. What's worse than giving a helpless child to someone who doesn't care about them. But then that's the fault of social services.

I just pointed out the fact that you spoke of adoption as if it guaranteed happiness, which it doesn't, most of the time it doesn't work out and most children end up in bad situations

[Revy the two hands]

It is a personal decision, but let's not forget that it's not the baby's fault for being conceived. In most cases it is a selfish decision because the first thing females think about is what people are going to think, they never planned it and how they're life is going to be like. In my oppinion I don't see how abortion is better than adoption. A couple of my close friends had abortions but I never see them any different, they just made an irrational decision at a stressful time and they agree and do regret it.

You know this how? I was "adopted" and I can definitely tell you, it's not good. And you're being incredibly judgmental

You don't need to know my life story. But of course the family you are to be adopted in would have to be one that is loving, perhaps you had a bad experience. What's worse than giving a helpless child to someone who doesn't care about them. But then that's the fault of social services.

I just pointed out the fact that you spoke of adoption as if it guaranteed happiness, which it doesn't, most of the time it doesn't work out and most children end up in bad situations

You should really stop trying to twist my words, I never said anything about it guaranteeing happiness, I never mentioned happiness at all. I said that adoption is better than abortion because it gives the baby a chance at life. And you don't know that most adopted children end up in bad situations. Just because you say you did does not mean everyone else is on the same path.

[Pennyroyal Tea]

You know this how? I was "adopted" and I can definitely tell you, it's not good. And you're being incredibly judgmental

You don't need to know my life story. But of course the family you are to be adopted in would have to be one that is loving, perhaps you had a bad experience. What's worse than giving a helpless child to someone who doesn't care about them. But then that's the fault of social services.

I just pointed out the fact that you spoke of adoption as if it guaranteed happiness, which it doesn't, most of the time it doesn't work out and most children end up in bad situations

You should really stop trying to twist my words, I never said anything about it guaranteeing happiness, I never mentioned happiness at all. I said that adoption is better than abortion because it gives the baby a chance at life. And you don't know that most adopted children end up in bad situations. Just because you say you did does not mean everyone else is on the same path.

Who said I didn't? I ended up fine, no thanks to adoption. And you obviously don't know anything about the system. Whereas growing up in it, at least in America, I know a lot about it. Specifically in New Jersey. A lot of the children that get adopted end up getting abused, both sexually, physically, and mentally. A large number used to live in terrible homes before they attempted to start to reform the system, it wasn't unheard of to hear about one of these children dying from neglect/abuse. I think the number was like almost half of them end up on the street by the age of eighteen most don't go onto college.

The system is drastically underfunded. Good homes are hard to find, there are a lot of variables you ignored because of this "chance at life" and I twisted not one of your words, I just pointed out the fact that it's not as simple as "hey lets put it up for adoption because then they'll have a great life" because the whole orphan Annie myth finding her daddy Warbucks. Which is why it is a personal decision for the parents of the future child to make. Because there isn't one option that is clearly better than the other.

[Revy the two hands]

I don't know what you are like, so I can't really believe that you ended up fine. You seem to talk about statistics but it just seems like you're talking about yourself.

And uh I know alot more than you think. As I said adoption is the best option when the system is supposed to do it's job and when the adopting parents do their job. And your argument seems to agree with mine in that respect. In the grand scheme of things it is better than abortion. The parents may have failed to plan the baby but from the day it is conceived it is either their responsibility or they give the responsibility to someone else. It is not their decision whether to 'continue' to give it life or not. There are heaps of people who would love to have a baby of their own and show it the love it deserves, even if the biological parents decide to give up such a blessing.