Pregnancy Scares

[Kitty]

Sex isn't as good as you'd imagine.
But, depending on the position it can be great exercise!

That's what people have told me as well and sometimes I think then that maybe I'm not missing much.

Seriously? How is not as good as imagined? It's great! But it also depends on who you do it with. Like if your with someone you absolutely love its a hell of a lot better.
It's pleasurable and if your under stress it helps release the stress. But then again it also depends on the person.

I was never really into the idea of sex, no matter the person. Always figured I was too intellectual for sex, but I do it for who I'm with now more than anything, since I do love him and all that. Being close to him is wonderful, but the actual feeling was a let down from what the media makes it out to be.

I get what you mean..

What emotional and physical outcomes are there besides being satisfied? If you use a rubber and make sure it doesn't break then your good to go. And to be safe the pill is good too, I take the shot myself.

1. After breaking up with that person, there's probly still the emotional attachment and memories.
2. STD's, anyone?
3. Religious beliefs and morals.
4. Being labeled as easy.
5. Condoms don't always work.
6. Wouldn't you rather someone be with you for who you are as a person, and not whether or not you're putting out?

1. It depends on how long you have been with the person.
2. that is why there are condoms.
3. I don't have religious beliefs.
4. That is true. But I still think that is stupid. Because It's bad for girls to do it because they are labeled easy but for the guys they are awesome because of it and are considered players.
5. I haven't had any problem with condoms and you can tell usually if something is wrong with it. and that is also why there are other forms of birth control. Like the shot which is what I take.
6. True. But not all guys will be in the relationship just for sex.

We all have our reasons, I'm stating mine just as you've stated your own.

Also, not all STDs are prevented by condoms. If you've taken a basic health class you should know that.

True. It also depends on where they are infected and anyway you should ask the person before.. even though that would be kinda awkward.. "hey before we do it do you have any STDS?" But it is better if your with the one you love to do it, especially if you both know you want to be with each other for the rest of your lives, even if your not married yet.

[Jade_Steel_Hawk]

A lot of people with STDs don't know they have them, and they find out once their partner is infected. I suppose they could get tested, but even that isn't always 100%.

[Shining Star]

That's what people have told me as well and sometimes I think then that maybe I'm not missing much.

Seriously? How is not as good as imagined? It's great! But it also depends on who you do it with. Like if your with someone you absolutely love its a hell of a lot better.
It's pleasurable and if your under stress it helps release the stress. But then again it also depends on the person.

I was never really into the idea of sex, no matter the person. Always figured I was too intellectual for sex, but I do it for who I'm with now more than anything, since I do love him and all that. Being close to him is wonderful, but the actual feeling was a let down from what the media makes it out to be.

I get what you mean..

1. After breaking up with that person, there's probly still the emotional attachment and memories.
2. STD's, anyone?
3. Religious beliefs and morals.
4. Being labeled as easy.
5. Condoms don't always work.
6. Wouldn't you rather someone be with you for who you are as a person, and not whether or not you're putting out?

1. It depends on how long you have been with the person.
2. that is why there are condoms.
3. I don't have religious beliefs.
4. That is true. But I still think that is stupid. Because It's bad for girls to do it because they are labeled easy but for the guys they are awesome because of it and are considered players.
5. I haven't had any problem with condoms and you can tell usually if something is wrong with it. and that is also why there are other forms of birth control. Like the shot which is what I take.
6. True. But not all guys will be in the relationship just for sex.

We all have our reasons, I'm stating mine just as you've stated your own.

Also, not all STDs are prevented by condoms. If you've taken a basic health class you should know that.

True. It also depends on where they are infected and anyway you should ask the person before.. even though that would be kinda awkward.. "hey before we do it do you have any STDS?" But it is better if your with the one you love to do it, especially if you both know you want to be with each other for the rest of your lives, even if your not married yet.

See that last part I'll never agree with. But that goes for anybody who knows me. I'm holding onto my v-card...(yes I said the lame phrase) until my wedding night. It's a combonation of my morals and my religion. More of the first then the second because i've only had religion for a couple of years. And I realize there is more to life. I mean sure I want it bad but not bad enough for the possible heartbreak.

[Kitty]

Amy: lol. Well everyone has there own way of doing things so I support you all the way.

Jade: Very true.

[Shining Star]

Amy: lol. Well everyone has there own way of doing things so I support you all the way.

Jade: Very true.

Thanks bud. I know you do.

[Kitty]

[Pennyroyal Tea]

Sure. Having sex does give you a chance of getting an STD. But there are plenty of steps you can take to avoid it, sure 1 out of four people in the U.S. may have an STD at any given time, but that's 3/4 who don't. There are plenty of ways to stay safe, and have fun.


I like how in any argument, the sides always argues against the worst aspects of the opposing side. Sure, the physical aspect of a relationship may or may not attach you to a person. Most of the time, I'm going to air on the side of not. I think that what really attaches a person to someone is emotions, whether or not they have sex. I've had my heart broken by people I haven't had sex with, I've had relationships end with someone I did get physically intimate with and really felt nothing.

Sex serves as a connection, like playing video games together, or seeing movies, or doing any activity together. You can argue that sex is a bit deeper, and I'll give you that, but I think it rarely makes the deciding factor of how you feel at the end of the relationship.

There are exceptions of course, but in the end, what happens to each of us rarely has to do with what we do, and mostly has to do with the decisions you make. You can choose the right person to have a relationship with you avoid the argument all together, because sex or not if someone is going to get close to you and break your heart. It'll happen regardless if you go or not.

[Kitty]

^ I agree.

[Jade_Steel_Hawk]

I like how in any argument, the sides always argues against the worst aspects of the opposing side. Sure, the physical aspect of a relationship may or may not attach you to a person. Most of the time, I'm going to air on the side of not. I think that what really attaches a person to someone is emotions, whether or not they have sex. I've had my heart broken by people I haven't had sex with, I've had relationships end with someone I did get physically intimate with and really felt nothing.

Better safe than sorry. The physical aspect shouldn't be a factor in attaching yourself to someone, but a lot of times it is. Those times when you feel nothing after getting physical would probably be called rebounds. In my experience, rebound relationships just make me feel worse, so what's the point? Give yourself some time between relationships.

There are exceptions of course, but in the end, what happens to each of us rarely has to do with what we do, and mostly has to do with the decisions you make. You can choose the right person to have a relationship with you avoid the argument all together, because sex or not if someone is going to get close to you and break your heart. It'll happen regardless if you go or not.

For me, guys that casually have sex before marriage, long-term relationship or not, are on my "just friends" list. The chances of them ever getting into a relationship with me are quite low, though I understand how easy it is for one thing to lead to another. It's just a lot less appealing. I like guys with self-control. If he can't control himself, how the heck is he going to run a family in the future? I find it a whole lot easier to put my trust into those who abstain from sexual desires.

[Shining Star]

I like how in any argument, the sides always argues against the worst aspects of the opposing side. Sure, the physical aspect of a relationship may or may not attach you to a person. Most of the time, I'm going to air on the side of not. I think that what really attaches a person to someone is emotions, whether or not they have sex. I've had my heart broken by people I haven't had sex with, I've had relationships end with someone I did get physically intimate with and really felt nothing.

Better safe than sorry. The physical aspect shouldn't be a factor in attaching yourself to someone, but a lot of times it is. Those times when you feel nothing after getting physical would probably be called rebounds. In my experience, rebound relationships just make me feel worse, so what's the point? Give yourself some time between relationships.

There are exceptions of course, but in the end, what happens to each of us rarely has to do with what we do, and mostly has to do with the decisions you make. You can choose the right person to have a relationship with you avoid the argument all together, because sex or not if someone is going to get close to you and break your heart. It'll happen regardless if you go or not.

For me, guys that casually have sex before marriage, long-term relationship or not, are on my "just friends" list. The chances of them ever getting into a relationship with me are quite low, though I understand how easy it is for one thing to lead to another. It's just a lot less appealing. I like guys with self-control. If he can't control himself, how the heck is he going to run a family in the future? I find it a whole lot easier to put my trust into those who abstain from sexual desires.

Jade that last part..sums up exactly how i have felt for years.
Bravo. I love guys with self-control to. I feel like the ones who don't, respect you less when you say you don't want it.

And Andre in some ways I do agree with you. When it comes to sex..it's not so much the physical that bothers me, its the emotional because they don't make condoms for the heart.

[Pennyroyal Tea]

I like how in any argument, the sides always argues against the worst aspects of the opposing side. Sure, the physical aspect of a relationship may or may not attach you to a person. Most of the time, I'm going to air on the side of not. I think that what really attaches a person to someone is emotions, whether or not they have sex. I've had my heart broken by people I haven't had sex with, I've had relationships end with someone I did get physically intimate with and really felt nothing.

Better safe than sorry. The physical aspect shouldn't be a factor in attaching yourself to someone, but a lot of times it is. Those times when you feel nothing after getting physical would probably be called rebounds. In my experience, rebound relationships just make me feel worse, so what's the point? Give yourself some time between relationships.

You made quite the assumption. I liked the person I was intimate with, and we talked about dating, it just never panned out. It was pretty far from a rebound. Intellectually, and emotionally I'm pretty mature. I share a quality with Macbeth. In the story, he was always honest with himself. I'm the same way, as long as you're honest with yourself you can generally avoid rebound relationships and the like. And also, I didn't say I felt nothing for the person. I felt nothing about it not working out.

There are exceptions of course, but in the end, what happens to each of us rarely has to do with what we do, and mostly has to do with the decisions you make. You can choose the right person to have a relationship with you avoid the argument all together, because sex or not if someone is going to get close to you and break your heart. It'll happen regardless if you go or not.

For me, guys that casually have sex before marriage, long-term relationship or not, are on my "just friends" list. The chances of them ever getting into a relationship with me are quite low, though I understand how easy it is for one thing to lead to another. It's just a lot less appealing. I like guys with self-control. If he can't control himself, how the heck is he going to run a family in the future? I find it a whole lot easier to put my trust into those who abstain from sexual desires.

Again, you make an assumption. Not everyone who has sex does it because they can't control themselves. I've gone months without it. And I can say that it doesn't change me, I'm never tempted to be in a relationship with someone just for sex. In fact, I once was thrown out of a friend's house that I was staying with precisely because I wouldn't have sex with her.It's an individual thing. Also, one bad quality doesn't always assume another.

I like how in any argument, the sides always argues against the worst aspects of the opposing side. Sure, the physical aspect of a relationship may or may not attach you to a person. Most of the time, I'm going to air on the side of not. I think that what really attaches a person to someone is emotions, whether or not they have sex. I've had my heart broken by people I haven't had sex with, I've had relationships end with someone I did get physically intimate with and really felt nothing.

Better safe than sorry. The physical aspect shouldn't be a factor in attaching yourself to someone, but a lot of times it is. Those times when you feel nothing after getting physical would probably be called rebounds. In my experience, rebound relationships just make me feel worse, so what's the point? Give yourself some time between relationships.

There are exceptions of course, but in the end, what happens to each of us rarely has to do with what we do, and mostly has to do with the decisions you make. You can choose the right person to have a relationship with you avoid the argument all together, because sex or not if someone is going to get close to you and break your heart. It'll happen regardless if you go or not.

For me, guys that casually have sex before marriage, long-term relationship or not, are on my "just friends" list. The chances of them ever getting into a relationship with me are quite low, though I understand how easy it is for one thing to lead to another. It's just a lot less appealing. I like guys with self-control. If he can't control himself, how the heck is he going to run a family in the future? I find it a whole lot easier to put my trust into those who abstain from sexual desires.

When it comes to sex..it's not so much the physical that bothers me, its the emotional because they don't make condoms for the heart.

You see, that's not exactly true. You see what I'm saying is you can't assume that the fact that you're having sex with a person would make you more attached than any of the things that you do with the person that you care for. And that's not exactly true. Like a condom is usually made of laytex, and isn't always foolproof.

Condoms for the heart can only be bought with experience and good judgment. You can be careful about who you let in, and how far they get in. It doesn't mean you make them run through hoops or anything, or you do everything that you can to prevent it. But you can be honest with yourself and the situation and do things to protect you. You can slow things down, and do a better job of getting to know the person, and learn how to take off those rose colored glasses that make everything seem better. In those moments, you can see when or if it's going too fast, or if it needs to just stop. It's there. You just have to get off your butt and seek to make your life, your relationship, and yourself better. The whole better safe than sorry attitude is like the guy who sits in a magic bubble. Sure he may not get sick, but he doesn't get stronger, because for every sickness he gets, he may go down for awhile, but when he comes out of it he's stronger for it. And next time he doesn't get as sick, or doesn't get sick entirely.

Broken hearts may heart, but they make you strong. You learn how to deal with things.

[Kitty]

^ well said. I've had sex with a guy and not gotten attached. I know I probably sound like a slut or something but I'm not. I can also control myself and go without sex for a long time. Even though I know you all were talking about guys but I just wanted to state that girls can do it too. I've also had my heart broken and your right, you learn from it and your more careful and it does make you stronger.

[Jade_Steel_Hawk]

Better safe than sorry. The physical aspect shouldn't be a factor in attaching yourself to someone, but a lot of times it is. Those times when you feel nothing after getting physical would probably be called rebounds. In my experience, rebound relationships just make me feel worse, so what's the point? Give yourself some time between relationships.

You made quite the assumption. I liked the person I was intimate with, and we talked about dating, it just never panned out. It was pretty far from a rebound. Intellectually, and emotionally I'm pretty mature. I share a quality with Macbeth. In the story, he was always honest with himself. I'm the same way, as long as you're honest with yourself you can generally avoid rebound relationships and the like. And also, I didn't say I felt nothing for the person. I felt nothing about it not working out.

I apologize; I shouldn’t have put that in second person. I meant to say that, in general, when one doesn’t feel heartbroken after a relationship ends, that’s typically a rebound relationship. I didn’t mean to assume anything about you. I haven’t read that book, by the way.

For me, guys that casually have sex before marriage, long-term relationship or not, are on my "just friends" list. The chances of them ever getting into a relationship with me are quite low, though I understand how easy it is for one thing to lead to another. It's just a lot less appealing. I like guys with self-control. If he can't control himself, how the heck is he going to run a family in the future? I find it a whole lot easier to put my trust into those who abstain from sexual desires.

Again, you make an assumption. Not everyone who has sex does it because they can't control themselves. I've gone months without it. And I can say that it doesn't change me, I'm never tempted to be in a relationship with someone just for sex. In fact, I once was thrown out of a friend's house that I was staying with precisely because I wouldn't have sex with her.It's an individual thing. Also, one bad quality doesn't always assume another.

It’s not all because of the self-control issue, it’s also about self-respect and personal beliefs. Bad qualities don’t always go hand in hand, but I know what I’m looking for in someone, as others generally know what they’re looking for in a relationship and possibly marriage.

[Kitty]

You don't have to not have sex to have self-respect.

[Jade_Steel_Hawk]

Because you claim no religious beliefs, your case is different than my own. We have very different perspectives on how to live. Notice that I tied self-respect in with personal beliefs [which would include religion] in my previous post.

[Seras]

I hate when people who don't take precautions(condoms, pill, shot, surgery) get pregnancy scares. Once is fine... twice is starting to push it because you'd think they'd learn but more then that I just want to tell them to shut up because they did it to themselves.

I've never had a pregnancy scare but I imagine I'll be deciding on abortion or keeping the little thing. If I can't take care of it then I would abort it. If I can then YAY ME I don't have to abort it. And if you know me then me aborting it would probably make me depressed and possibly suicidal.

I kinda want to know what a guy is thinking when a girl says to him "I might be pregnant." I really have no idea what some guys would think but they're all pretty negative unless the guy actually wanted the baby in the first place or is prepared to settle with it. So if some guys can step forth and fill me in on what they think... that'd be nice